(no subject)

i feel so lost today

i know i should stop grinding my teeth and listening to the silence and my empty stomach

i'm angry at my brain and my memory. somedays you stare through the glass at a robot of yourself living the life you dont want, but that's all there is for you

today's been a nauseating spending spree and judgement about money and time
nothing matters
i cant even help people and im just listening to myself talk at the wall and laughing at my own jokes

at least its past 6 am with the sun coming up and i remember again that music exists

i want to scream and scream and scream until i lose my voice because i dont have anything to say anyway